skelooth

Thanks spaceclown

I'm feeling a little better past couple of days... but it's been about a week since I've stepped foot in the gym unfortunately. I took more than a few steps backwards. I'm not out yet though...

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spaceclown

I had to take yesterday off cause of sickness. I hate it but we do have to rest. BTW I think we weigh the same now 250

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Spaceclown

skelooth

last post in this thread 05-29-2007
Todays date 07-07-2007

Who wants to join me in my pity party? I will not be submitting photos this morning. I am in the worst shape I've been in for a very long time. My waist line is nudging it's self to a snug 42" pants, I've got man tits, redeveloping my bra rolls, and well quite frankly there's no other way to put it: I'm fat again.

Who do I have to blame? No one but myself. At first I blamed the stress of school (which I was incredibley stressed out). But now I'm not in school. This whole summer I've sat on my ass, ate snack cakes and pizza, and programmed. I've done very little else. My skin quality's gone to hell, I look like hell, feel like hell, and none of my clothes fit. I look at the clothes I wore just a few months ago and can't believe I actually used to fit into them. Fat memory is an amazing thing.

So there you have it. I will not be winning the most improved physique, because it would take me the rest of the competition just to get back to where I was when it started. I don't go to the gym because I'm ashamed. Hell, I've gone back to not going OUTSIDE because of how I look. I think I've developed a pretty serious eating disorder and case of depression.

So here it is, my pity party. August 8th would have been three years of working out. I used to call August 8th my second birthday, though it seems I won't be making it, as I've already 'died'.

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spaceclown

Well throw the hat in for IMPC but get back in the gym and get the diet back in check. It has made dramatic difference in my mental well being.

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Spaceclown

skelooth

I keep meaning too, and it keeps not happening. Really I've never been off the wagon this long or this hard before in the past 3 years.

Not sure if I'm out of the IMPC yet, I just said I'm not going to win

I'm realizing the shock and awe bomb of fatness that went off on my body, and I'm too damned lazy and ashamed to fix it.

If I'm still in this rut by this time next month, I will resign from the competition and stop trying to fool myself. Hopefully it won't be the case...

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irishprincess

I will not let u baby! u got me in to this as a team and well we are gonna finish it that way too!!! i will help u all i can and I mean that !!

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Let's get it on!!!!

DJohnson

Bah, I bet you could shed most of that pretty fast, even with months off your fitness levels will be waaaaay better than they were 3 years ago. Plus you know what you're doing now. Just gotta get up and do it.

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Age: 21 Height: 5'10.5"
Mar, 2001: 135lbs @ ~14%
Nov, 2004: 245lbs @ ~40%
Feb, 2006: 188lbs @ 20.1% - Hydrostatic Tested
Dec, 2006: 168lbs @ 5.5% - 7 Point Caliper Tested
BULKING FOR A LONG TIME NOW
Long Term Goal: Over 200lbs @ 8%

madman911

Skel, you need to get angry... screw this lazy and ashamed 'poor pitiful me' BS. Aren't you pissed at yourself for letting go of what you worked so hard for? Imagine where you'd be if you hadn't fallen off the wagon and stayed diligent this entire time... you'd be right up at the top of the IMPC pack. That fact should make you supremely pissed at yourself. Self pity is a normal response, but you've gotta get pissed to really do something about it. Anger can be a very positive force when properly channeled. Look in the mirror and, instead of pouting, get angry and take that anger out on the weights.

If you can't get angry, then you'll find it difficult to force your ass into the gym. Speaking for myself, I've always had to get to the point of being downright enraged at myself in order to get 'back on the wagon'. When I'd feel sorry for myself, I'd just sit on the couch eating McDonald's and swigging beers, as if the behavior was beyond my control. One day I'd get pissed at what I saw in the mirror and just say '***** it'... you're going to the gym, or joining a martial arts class, or learning how to inline skate... all of these things helped me to get in shape at one time or another. As much as you love lifting, you could try other modes of exercise if you need a change to motivate you.

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Midnight_Lifter

Skel... I'm kinda in the same boat as you (not much progress this past month and all due to my own (((laziness/stupidity/lack of motivation/assholishness/etc.))) and nothing else!).

What am I doing about it? Posting up crap-ass pics for the month and using the experience to recenter myself and regain that focus and motivation.
You and I have both done great in the past, and have lost all progress and more on occasion. Reasons/excuses/whatever -- it's happened and might happen again. This time, the pendulum is ready to swing back the other way and it looks like a great run into the November excitement.

I'm not happy with what my pics are going to look like, I think I actually fell back a notch since last month. I know what worked for me in the past, and I have an idea of what will work for me this time around -- but I do know nothing is going to happen until I get back to that place where I was/am when I *have to* go lift or row or whatever and I *have to* eat properly.

For me, if I feel as if I can't go lift b/c it's late and I'm tired, I have to remind myself that I will only be up all night beating myself up about not going to work out, so I'd better just get down there and throw some weights around.

I hope you can pull it together, man. No -- I know you will pull it together...

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- Discipline means doing within, not doing without.
"Nothin' to it but to do it!"

*Currently rebuilding in phase one...