Great weight loss method

Master Of Puppets · 12-03-2005, 02:01 AM

Taken from the vast resources of the internet:

Did you hear about the heavyset guy who had tried every diet in the world in an attempt to lose weight? He tried the Scarsdale diet, the Navy diet, Weight Watchers, and many more. None worked. One day, he was reading the Washington Post when he noticed a small ad which read:

Lose weight Only $1.00 a pound Call 08-0238
The man decided to give it a try and called the number. A voice on the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?', to which the man responded, 'Ten pounds.' The voice replied, 'Very well, give me your credit card number and we'll have a representative over to your house in the morning.'

About 9:00 am the next morning the man gets a knock on the door. There stood a beautiful redheaded woman, completely naked except for a sign around her neck stating, 'If you catch me, you can have me'.

Well, the hefty fellow chased her upstairs, downstairs, over sofas, through the kitchen, all around the house. Finally, panting and wheezing like a dog, he did catch her. When he was through enjoying himself, she said, 'Quick, go into the bathroom and weigh yourself!'. He did just that and was amazed to find that he had lost ten pounds, right to the ounce!

That evening he called the number again. The voice on the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?', to which the somewhat less overweight man replied, 'Twenty pounds.'

'Very well', the voice on the phone told him, 'Give me your credit card number and we'll have a representative over to your house in the morning.'

At about 8:00 am the next morning the man receives a knock on the door. When he opens the door he sees a beautiful blond dressed only in track shoes and a sign around her neck stating 'If you catch me, you can have me'. The chase took a good while longer this time and the man nearly passed out, but he finally did catch her. When he was through she told him, 'Quick, run into the bathroom and weigh yourself!' He ran to the bathroom and found he had lost another 20 pounds!

'This is fantastic!', he thought to himself. Later that evening he called the number again and the voice at the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?'. 'Fifty pounds!', the man exclaimed. 'Fifty pounds?', the voice asked. 'That's an awful lot of weight to lose at one time.' The man replied, 'Listen buddy, here's my credit card number, you just have your representative over here in the morning!', and he hung up the phone.

About 6:00 am the next morning the man gets out of bed, splashes on some cologne and gets all ready for the next representative. At about 7:00 am he gets a knock on the door. When he opens the door, he sees this large gorilla with a sign around his neck stating,

'If I catch you, I'm going to screw you’

MOP

strongman72 · 12-03-2005, 05:11 AM

LMFAO!!!!!That is some funny stuff!!!Good posts!!!

chlaxman · 12-03-2005, 05:48 AM

I've heard that before although when I heard it the gorilla was just a guy in running shoes.

In any case, lol

Lift · 12-03-2005, 11:20 AM

lmao good one

**DJSTARER** · 12-03-2005, 03:44 PM

nice....

**Ikaika** · 12-03-2005, 03:46 PM

rofl...that just made me spill my coffee due to the sudden outburst of laughing. Great post.

**bigDman** · 12-03-2005, 05:13 PM

old news ive been loseing wieght this way for years

12-03-2005, 02:01 AM	#1
Master Of Puppets Registered User Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,013 Recipes: 0 Rep Power: 47	Great weight loss method Taken from the vast resources of the internet: Did you hear about the heavyset guy who had tried every diet in the world in an attempt to lose weight? He tried the Scarsdale diet, the Navy diet, Weight Watchers, and many more. None worked. One day, he was reading the Washington Post when he noticed a small ad which read: Lose weight Only $1.00 a pound Call 08-0238 The man decided to give it a try and called the number. A voice on the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?', to which the man responded, 'Ten pounds.' The voice replied, 'Very well, give me your credit card number and we'll have a representative over to your house in the morning.' About 9:00 am the next morning the man gets a knock on the door. There stood a beautiful redheaded woman, completely naked except for a sign around her neck stating, 'If you catch me, you can have me'. Well, the hefty fellow chased her upstairs, downstairs, over sofas, through the kitchen, all around the house. Finally, panting and wheezing like a dog, he did catch her. When he was through enjoying himself, she said, 'Quick, go into the bathroom and weigh yourself!'. He did just that and was amazed to find that he had lost ten pounds, right to the ounce! That evening he called the number again. The voice on the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?', to which the somewhat less overweight man replied, 'Twenty pounds.' 'Very well', the voice on the phone told him, 'Give me your credit card number and we'll have a representative over to your house in the morning.' At about 8:00 am the next morning the man receives a knock on the door. When he opens the door he sees a beautiful blond dressed only in track shoes and a sign around her neck stating 'If you catch me, you can have me'. The chase took a good while longer this time and the man nearly passed out, but he finally did catch her. When he was through she told him, 'Quick, run into the bathroom and weigh yourself!' He ran to the bathroom and found he had lost another 20 pounds! 'This is fantastic!', he thought to himself. Later that evening he called the number again and the voice at the other end asked, 'How much weight do you want to lose?'. 'Fifty pounds!', the man exclaimed. 'Fifty pounds?', the voice asked. 'That's an awful lot of weight to lose at one time.' The man replied, 'Listen buddy, here's my credit card number, you just have your representative over here in the morning!', and he hung up the phone. About 6:00 am the next morning the man gets out of bed, splashes on some cologne and gets all ready for the next representative. At about 7:00 am he gets a knock on the door. When he opens the door, he sees this large gorilla with a sign around his neck stating, 'If I catch you, I'm going to screw you’ MOP __________________

12-03-2005, 05:11 AM	#2
strongman72 Pro Stature Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Corpus Christi, Texas Posts: 205 Recipes: 0 Rep Power: 10	LMFAO!!!!!That is some funny stuff!!!Good posts!!! __________________ Runnin in 30 degree weather,rain -guy says to me "What they hell are you runnin in this for,you're crazy!" I laugh and say, "Na just dedicated!":bass: 2006 POWERLIFTING REGIONAL QUALIFIER UPDATE Status-STILL WORKING TO GET TO THE TOP Age:17 Bench: 300 (315) Incline: 250 Squat: 445 (465) Power Clean: 225 (235) Deadlift: 500 Raw - Due to a torn quad injury it has gone down. () are goals that are to be done in 3 months.

12-03-2005, 05:48 AM	#3
chlaxman Pro Stature Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Maine baby Posts: 560 Recipes: 0 Rep Power: 9	I've heard that before although when I heard it the gorilla was just a guy in running shoes. In any case, lol __________________ Tempora mutantur, et nos mutamur in illis. :weight_li :dumbells: :bed2: :friday:

12-03-2005, 11:20 AM	#4
Lift I Love IronMass.Com Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 825 Recipes: 0 Rep Power: 11	lmao good one __________________ MrLiftALot@hotmail.com "King Kong Ain't Got Sh*t On Me..."

12-03-2005, 03:44 PM	#5
DJSTARER eating more folate... Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: State College, PA Posts: 4,041 Recipes: 0 Rep Power: 114	nice.... __________________ My philosophies on training: "Extreme training yields extreme results" "Just because you can, does not mean you should" "The best program is the one you are not doing" Penn State Powerlifting-181 lb weightclass PGA Professional of America Current Stats: 474 Squat 601 Deadlift 320 Bench Goals for next training cycle: 500lbs squat and a total over 1400 in competition

12-03-2005, 03:46 PM	#6
Ikaika resident degen Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: San Diego, CA Posts: 3,765 Recipes: 0 Rep Power: 216	rofl...that just made me spill my coffee due to the sudden outburst of laughing. Great post. __________________ No supplement can make up for the lack of a strong work ethic.

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