Vegeto

My sister sent me this advice by e-mail today...

Here's a cure for all of those pesky problems:

Anger Management

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take
it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on
someone you don't know.

I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten
to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying "Hello."
I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?"

Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right number!" and
the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be
so rude. When I tracked down Robyn's correct number to call her, I found
that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.

After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.
When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled ?You?re an idiot!" and hung
up. I wrote his number down with the word 'idiot' next to it, and put it
in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a
really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, ?You?re an idiot!" It always
cheered me up.

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic 'idiot' calling
would have to stop.

So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the
Telstra.

I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?"

He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone.

I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an idiot!"

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.

Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had
patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for
that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his
back window, so I wrote down his number.

A couple of days later, right after calling the first idiot ( I had his
number on speed dial,) I thought that I'd better call the BMW idiot, too.

I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"

"Yes, it is", he said. "Can you tell me where I can see it?" I asked.

"Yes, I live at 34 Mowbray Blvd, in Vaucluse. It's a yellow house, and
the car's parked right out in front."

"What's your name?" I asked.

"My name is Don Hansen," he said.

"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"

"I'm home every evening after five."

"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"

"Yes?"

"Don, you're an idiot!" Then I hung up, and added his number to my
speed dial, too.

Now, when I had a problem, I had two idiots to call. Then I came up
with an idea. I called Idiot #1.

"Hello."

"You're an idiot!" (But I didn't hang up.)

"Are you still there?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Stop calling me," he screamed.

"Make me," I said.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"My name is Don Hansen."

"Yeah? Where do you live?"

"Idiot, I live at 34 Mowbray Blvd, Vaucluse, a yellow house, with my
black Beamer parked in front."

He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start
saying your prayers."

I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, idiot," and hung up.

Then I called Idiot #2. "Hello?" he said.

"Hello, idiot," I said.

He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..."

"You'll what?" I said.

"I'll kick your butt," he exclaimed.

I answered, "Well, idiot, here's your chance. I'm coming over right
now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived
at 34 Mowbray Blvd, Vaucluse, and that I was on my way over there to kill
my gay lover. Then I called Channel 9 News, about the gang war, going down
in Mowbray Blvd, Vaucluse.

I quickly got into my car and headed over to Mowbray. I got there just
in time to watch two idiots beating the crap out of each other in front of
six cop cars, an overhead police helicopter and a news crew.

NOW I feel much better.

Anger management really works.

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Hybrid

LMFAO!!! That is genius, pure genius!

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If you even dream about beating me you'd better wake up and apologize - Muhammad Ali

pammiejoe6

personally i just feel better singing the song from the movie....cmon now everyone sing it with me.....


I FEEL PRETTY.....

antihero

thats the best thing i ever read......

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Disclaimer: Information given by me is my personal opinion.
It cannot be considered medical advice and does not represent the official opinion of a company that is not a sponsor here.
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antihero

OH SO PRETTY....

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Disclaimer: Information given by me is my personal opinion.
It cannot be considered medical advice and does not represent the official opinion of a company that is not a sponsor here.
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marlon

haha nice! idiot #1 got involved for no reason though lol... just cuz the guy called the wrong number.

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Vegeto

Yeah, I think so too. Makes a good story though.

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Suppish-Alpha-OG

rofl thats funny

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METAL VIPER

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :lmao2: :lmao2: :lmao2: :lmao2:
That was rich :nosthumbs

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DIE, by my hand, I creep across the land, killing first born man

manders

ha ha ha ha

Master Of Puppets

lmao

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